A while ago I had a 3-way touch experience that was so beautiful, so sensual, so intimate. It was deeply arousing, with no penetration, no orgasm. It was just hands flowing over skin, bodies touching,...
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Recently a few people, both couples and single people have come to see me because they're sexually bored. I've been teaching in the field of Conscious Sexuality for over 20 years, and this is a...
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Much of my work is in the world of sexual healing. At least that's where many journeys start, then they become more about learning, growing, exploring, expanding. These journeys also become more about life, all...
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Yesterday I shared a post that I wrote a while ago, called What's Become of Us. It's on my page if you'd like to read it. It was prompted by a few things. Many women...
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The past weeks have been difficult for me. I've felt a little lost, alone, down. I'm usually quite focused, I've been scattered. I've been thinking about where I'm going in a way that's not directed...
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Much of my work is, or begins with sexuality, the relationship we have with our sexuality is, of course, a large part of this. This relationship forms the framework of the journey, it gives it...
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Last week I did a rope workshop facilitated by a friend in Australia. It was a very non-traditional approach, that wasn't really about tying, knots, positions etc, which is often quite technical. This was about...
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Our sexuality is a guide, a teacher, a path of personal enquiry, a way to experience energy, a way to access deep states of consciousness, a way to become incredibly intimate with ourselves, a place...
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We talk about all the different kinds of orgasms women, and men, can experience. Many people I, and I'm sure many other practitioners, work with, come to learn how to have these different experiences. In...
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Yoni or Lingam Meditation of Gazing is looking with, through, the eyes of your heart. It's a meditation on loving, accepting, acknowledging, in the giving and in the receiving. It's a meditation on presence, sexual...
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There is such power, such possibility, in one breath. In the world of pleasure we're often looking for more. More feeling, more sensation, more experiences, more technique, more partners, more toys… Most of these things...
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I talk about, teach about, Making Love with Life, and the limitless possibilities that that holds for us. Last week I had such a direct and beautiful experience of this. In these moments, Life, in...
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The afternoon winter sun, it's delicious in Johannesburg. Coffee and a few mouthfuls of something sweet. I have a weakness for pastry, and today it's a mini almond croissant. A digression, more coffee shops should...
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For over 25 years on my journey into Conscious Sexuality I've been learning about men and male sexuality. Firstly by going into my own Sexuality and sensuality, and then by spending so much time with...
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Part of Cl-iteracy, which is to be clitorally literate. To be literate with something is to know it, to have knowledge of it. And to be able to read it, to understand it. That on its own...
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TThere's a thing with sex, as soon as we're inside someone, or someone is inside us, to move. It's almost as if our pelvis has a life, a will of its own, as if we're programmed...
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Tears on my chest Sacred tears. I sat with a man in Yab-Yum, holding him, naked chest to naked chest, heart to heart. We sat in stillness and breathed, coming into our bodies, softening into each...
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At the opening of her Yoni, pause. Before you enter her, pause. Be still, so still. And so much happens in this stillness, this moment of quiet. In this moment, this stillness, there's a listening to...
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I was thinking about how much of our sexual experience is in the category of hard and tight. Hard cocks, tight vaginas. Hard and tight is a space of pressure, a space of performance, a...
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I think we need more lovers than healers. We need more people to hold a space for us to feel loved in, simply loved. And this is where the healing happens. It's in the space...
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Every time we look into each other’s eyes, energy travels from me to you, you to me. Every kiss, every touch, energy. I breathe your breath into me, I take your essence, I give you mine. Every...
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From a place in my heart comes the ancient and sacred practice of holding, of resting my hands on your body. In stillness, deep stillness. In reverence. In love. For over 25 years I've been...
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The desire to awaken is deep The desire to surrender is deep The desire for the wild is deep Within us, men and women, is such a deep sexuality. A sexuality that is a portal to experience the...
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Naked Freedom, Naked Sex. Naked sex? Isn't all sex naked? Most of the time, sometimes it's partially clothed, sometimes it's in a costume, sometimes it's just pulling something down, pulling something aside. And there's more. Naked...
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I've been teaching, exploring and experiencing in the wonderful and limitless worlds of sensuality and sexuality for over 25 years. In this time there is something I've seen so often, and at the moment more...
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I'd like to share an experience I had recently with a woman on a journey of healing and growth. We've been working together for a while and we've gone deep. It's time that makes the...
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It's time for a re-introduction. Because… The past month has been a time of integration of a lot of learning, experiencing, exploring, contemplating. Going within, and from there being able to share more with you....
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After doing and teaching, and receiving (not nearly enough), massage, so many different expressions, for over 25 years, I've seen how the body, the touch is a beautiful path to surrender. On many paths we...
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For years I have been helping men with performance issues, premature ejaculation and erection problems. Something landed for me recently with this work, and the clue was in the question, or the problem. Performance. That's...
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There's something interesting about touch and pleasure touch, sexual touch. We think that we need to move, and move all the time. And for many of us the pattern of movement is hard and fast,...
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I want to touch you like the water With the safety of the womb With the rivers endless flow With the oceans tides As I stroke to your centre And gently away With the gathering wave Crashing its love on the shores...
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Look into her eyes. Breathe. Just breathe. There are no thoughts in this moment. There is the opening to love. Breathe into your heart. Just breathe. ...
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Can you touch this body as if you were making love? Not making love as most of our world sees it. Making Love. Your hands expressing your heart. Taking care. Each movement gentle, slow, deep....
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I was looking through a Dropbox folder that had some pictures from a shoot we did a few years ago. There were some pictures of a double massage, two people massaging one person, four hands...
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One of the biggest blockages to experiencing and exploring the world of erotic massage is the story. The story is deeply ingrained and impacts on women more than men. It's a story that reflects the...
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We live in a world obsessed with measuring things, with the rightness or wrongness of so many aspects of life based on measurement. We judge people, give them value by how much they have. This...
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I had a beautiful experience last week, I taught a sensual massage lesson to a couple in their seventies who have been married for 52 years. It's not the first time people this age have...
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One of the most beautiful, and most powerful, gifts that an Erotic Massage experience gives us, is the gift of receiving. For so many women sex and pleasure come with many unstated rules and beliefs....
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One of the most beautiful, one of the most powerful, and one of the most healing ways of being seen and acknowledged is through touch. Touch is a language, a communication that often goes deeper...
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There's an interesting idea about healing, and life. For so long we've been convinced that it's about learning, about lessons, about fixing the problems, about diagnosing, putting it into a box with labels. And then...
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As a sex educator and healer, a workshop facilitator and massage teacher there's a question I get asked lots, as I'm sure many of my colleagues do. How do we have better sex? Now what...
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I was recently asked why I use the word 'erotic' and not 'tantric'. Every word has connotations, meanings, which are different in different parts of the world. They're also different internally, meaning different things to...
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I spent four days last week at The Love Sex Expo in Pretoria, South Africa. I gave 13 presentations and 8 massage demonstrations. I spoke to so many people at my stand where we were...
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A while ago I was sitting with some colleagues, facilitators in different fields. One of them said to me 'I wish I was brave enough to attend one of your workshops.' I was really surprised...
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There's a fascinating thing about expectation in the erotic context. This extends beyond massage into all sensual, sexual and erotic experiences. ...
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Let's talk about bodies. ...
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There’s something interesting that happens from time to time, with women more than men. A woman will come and talk about healing because her body isn’t very sensitive, she doesn’t get very aroused from being touched...
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