The way that we have sex is the way that we live.
In patterns.
In sexual terms what that means is that we do what we do, we follow our pattern.
We kiss in the same way, we touch in the same way, we do the same things in the same way.
Our partner does the same.
We do what we do, they do what they do.
We do it together, we take turns.
But it’s our pattern.
And in this, there’s no space for presence, for awareness, there’s no space for the dance of energy, the expression and sharing of our eroticism.
And when we go into the pattern, all that we can do is what we do, what we know.
We do what we do, our partner does the same.
And for most people it’s about having an orgasm, and our pattern is geared to that, to reaching that, achieving that. That’s the criterion for a successful sexual experience.
There is something I talk about a lot.
Orgasms are wonderful.
And orgasms are just one, just one, possibility in the limitless sea of pleasure and sexual energy experiences.
But when we’re in the pattern, and the goal is to come, it becomes a limitation, it keeps us from exploring, expanding, opening, endlessly.
There are different ways of experiencing this, expressing it, dancing in it, reveling in it, savoring it, allow it to transport you to an Expanded State of Consciousness, to a deep connection with yourself, with your lover, and with life.
When we become willing to engage in this way, to open, to open the space, to step into the space, we invite.
We invite ourselves, we invite our lover.
We invite the energy to take us beyond the mind, into conscious, super-conscious, expression.
We invite the energy to expand us, to intensify us, to dissolve us into beingness.
This is a different way of sexing, of pleasuring, of loving.
There has to be a letting go of what we know, of what we think we know.
There has to be a letting go of how.
We have to open something within us.
The first step in this is to learn to be still.
And to listen.
To listen to our body, to our breath, to our heart.
To allow something different to arise, to guide us.
To allow it, not do it.
Patience.
It will happen.
Then to follow that.
To allow it to lead us, not in the way we think it should be, not in the way we think it should go, not in the way we think it should happen.
Not in the pattern.
In the allowing.
From the stillness, there will be movement.
Slow, subtle.
And what you will feel, oh my, what you will experience…
If you’d like to understand your patterns more, expand them, change the experience of pleasure you have, please contact me, that’s the work that I do.
