Disneyland and The Holy Grail
So many of us are looking for the Disneyland of sex, love and pleasure. We think that’s where it is, the ultimate.
It’s like a roller-coaster or ghost-train. It’s a thrill. A quick thrill. There are some laughs. Your stomach hits your throat. There’s an adrenaline rush. Blood rushing through your body. There are some screams. You’re holding on really tight, muscles clenched.
And then it’s over.
You may tingle for a little while.
It’s hype, there’s glitz and loud music.
And there’s a lot of glitter and shiny paint.
It’s a rush.
And then it’s done.
And we’re in the line for the next ride.
And then we become aware of another ride.
It doesn’t have a neon sign flashing in the night.
It doesn’t have blaring music.
It’s off the main drag, round the corner. It may even be hidden behind some bushes.
It has a plain door.
It might not be easy to open.
And when we get it open, creaky and rusty, we might step into darkness.
And we might find ourselves on the set of Indiana Jones and The Holy Grail.
And there are all these challenges.
But the floor that disappears and the quicksand and the snake pit and the bridge burning with fire behind every step are a little different.
They’re all inside of us.
They’re our beliefs, our shame, our inhibitions, our guilt.
They’re our disconnects.
They’re our ego and righteousness.
They’re our armour and masks.
They’re our fears of intimacy and surrender.
They’re all the things we hold onto with everything we’ve got, fingernails clenched around the bar of the swing, with the illusions of safety below us.
And when we’ve passed some of these challenges and we’re in the chamber faced with all the possibilities, what do we choose?
Do we choose the depth, the limitless possibility of exploration and growth?
Do we choose to walk the path of intimacy in a way that we can’t see the next step until we put our foot there?
Do we choose pleasure, and the fire of the heart that will transform us in its crucible of energy?
Do we choose the unknown and the mystery that will take us beyond what our minds thought possible?
Do we choose love that gives us a vision of a life, a world filled with imagination?
Do we choose a ride that never ends in its expansion and its experience?
We’re in the dust here, stardust, earthdust, ancient, timeless, eternal.
And life is watching us with an open heart…