Making The After-Love Last



There’s so much said about foreplay, about the build-up to sex.

One of the most delicious times we can be in is after sex, what I’ve come to call The After-Love.

It’s a conscious space, a space of allowing.
It’s a time of peace and contentment, of harmony and connection. It’s the time where the intimacy of sex is often more present than during sex. This makes it a time of deep connection, to ourselves and our partners.
It’s often a time of almost meditation, we’re open and relaxed and peaceful. Energy flows, so inspiration flows.
It’s a time of being, we’re present, the consciousness of life surrounds us with ease.
It’s a time where we feel a different truth of our bodies, there’s a well-being and a calmness, a softness.
It can be a time of quiet where no words are needed, or a time of sharing from the heart.
It’s a time where we return to ourselves and to the world.
And it the time where we love. In the moments of pleasure our focus turns inwards to ourselves. In the After-Love we are in the cocoon we’ve spun with our partners.
It’s a magical time with many gifts.
It’s the time where the energy of pleasure is so present.
And sadly, it’s often a time short that we can’t allow ourselves the fullness of receiving what it has to offer.

There are 3 things we can do to spend more time in this beautiful place.

The first is one of the most powerful lessons we can share about pleasure.
Take orgasm out of your sexual experience.
Build the fire of pleasure, ride the waves of sensation, of feeling, of emotion for as long as you like or as long as you can.
Get close to the peak, not too close that you can’t step back. Flirt with it, dance away and come back.
Build it in you, share it between you.
Then simply be with it.
And be in The After-Love for as long as you can. It will stay with you, sometimes for days.

The second way to extend your After-Love is to consciously connect with your partner. Breathe together and look into each other’s eyes. Stay present after your pleasure, whether you orgasm or not. The deeper you breathe the more you slow everything down, the more present you’ll be. The breath will also help keep you in your body and out of your head.

The third way to deepen your After-Love is to move your body in whatever way the energy moves. After some sexual experiences we feel energised, maybe even fiery. Let that flow through you in dance and in sounds. Let it come from within. If you’re feeling slow and soft let your body express that. The movement, and sounds you make will keep the energy alive in your body.

There are many aspects of The After-Love, each one is as different as each time we make love. And very often this is the space we receive the gifts of our pleasure.