Some Thoughts on Healing


I’d like to share some thoughts on healing with you.

To put this in a context, I work with people with sexual and relationship issues. These journeys become life journeys, exploring all aspects of our being. I work with people of all orientations, all backgrounds, men, women and couples.

I follow no particular path, drawing from many teachings and traditions.

I’ve been doing this work for nearly 20 yrs, before that practicing Kinesiology, Shiatsu and other modalities.

The most recent development is teaching these principles and practices to entrepreneurs to help them grow their businesses.

I do bodywork, energy work and we talk lots.

The most important thing a healer, and I have to digress for a moment here. I’m exploring what many of the words we use actually mean in coming to a different story of life, of pleasure, of relationships and energy. I’m not sure about the word ‘healer’, but it’s what I have for now. I will add that nobody, no one, can heal you. Nobody can fix you, nobody can change you, nobody can grow you, nobody can expand you.

You can.

Everyone else on your journey, healers, guides, teachers, therapists, facilitators, they can give you guidance, insight, help you shift energy, teach you practices, open doors, create experiences and possibilities.

You’ll do the work.

Healing is a relationship, for me a deep connection with the people I share these journeys with.

The most important thing a healer can give is presence.

All the modalities, all the techniques, all the information, need presence.

To really listen to someone, deeply listen, with your ears yes, and with your body, with your heart, your intuition, with everything you can at that moment.

So much happens in this space.

So many of us have never been deeply acknowledged, deeply received.

When we sit in this space, in quiet, allowing someone to talk, to cry if they need, to breathe, to feel, to express, with presence, we’re allowing so much to happen. Without doing, by being.

Healing, deep change, learning, growing, comes from being. The doing that comes from this space is natural, not forced, there’s less struggle.

Be present. You’ll connect.

In presence there’s creativity, inspiration.

And in that space you become able to heal yourself.

The next thing I’d like to share is so difficult for many of us.

Take time.



To release what we need, to change what we’d like, to create what we’d like, takes time.

The more I understand about how deep our patterns are, how protective and defensive we are, often for survival, the more I see the stress we live with without often being aware of it, it’s become our default setting, the more I see the trauma so many of us carry, buried away inside so we can get up in the morning, the more I understand the power of slow.

Cherish yourself in this.

Love yourself, as hard as that is for many is because of what we’ve experienced, love yourself enough to allow your release, your changes.

Your building a new foundation for life, for pleasure, for relationships, for work.

It takes time to make it strong, so that the first storm that comes along, and we all have the storms, won’t blow your house down.

In a world of lunatic frantic Ness the power of having a place that’s slow is invaluable to every aspect of our being.

It takes time.

Allow it.

You’re precious. You’re here, alive as part of this amazing life. Go slow.

Depth, understanding, connection, intimacy with yourself, takes time.

So many of us want to be masters in a weekend.

Smile, nod, breathe.

And go deeper within.

With care with kindness, with compassion for yourself.

With love, no matter how long that takes, with love for yourself.


There’s more, a lot more.

This is where we’ll start.