We talk about Conscious Sexuality, and Conscious Experiences.
What makes a Conscious Sexual experience?
What makes it different from a ‘normal’ sexual experience?
And why would you want to have such an experience?
What would you get from it?
What would it change within you, what would it change in your relationship?
And in your life?
Let’s start with what a Conscious Experience is.
There’s a lot here, and a lot to talk about for this, and we can’t include everything.
More than anything else, consciousness means just that.
Most of the sexual experiences we have are anything but
They’re patterned, conditioned.
They follow a script that we’re mostly unaware of, as long as it ends in orgasm for, mostly one of us.
A Conscious Experience means that it has an intention.
Which is discussed, sometimes in great detail.
It’s about what we’d like to experience, what we’d like to feel, what it will include, what it won’t.
It doesn’t have a goal.
And it’s important to say this.
Orgasms are fantastic, wonderful, amazing, can be mind-blowing.
Orgasms are just one, just one, possibility in the limitless range of sensual, sexual, pleasure and erotic experiences.
Releasing ourselves from the ‘have to come’, ‘have to make you come’, frees us from the expectation.
Frees us to actually feel, to be present.
When we bring an intention, we’re bringing the possibility of fulfilment, deep fulfilment.
We’re bringing our hearts into the experience, we’re bringing the range of everything we feel.
We’re bringing open communication, we’re bringing the truth of our desire.
We’re bringing what we really want.
And when we have that freedom, so much that’s within us can be allowed out, to sing, to dance, with joy and celebration.
We’re bringing ourselves into liberation, into freedom.
And into possibility.
A Conscious Experience is actually about pleasure, more than it’s about sex, the way we define sex.
This is important because pleasure, Conscious Pleasure, gives us so much more.
It becomes more about intimacy and connection.
It becomes more about our hearts.
It becomes more about discovery and exploration.
It becomes more about adventure.
It opens us to what more there can be within us, between us.
It opens something in us that has such a longing to live.
Conscious Pleasure Experiences shatter our illusions,
Now we’re heading into deep water.
We’re heading into truth.
We’re heading into the place of change.
There is a truth here.
If we’d like something different, and that’s the key question, we have to do something different.
So many of us have so many sexual and relationship issues.
Whole industries exist because of them. I’m part of that.
And I’d love to spend more time teaching you how to have deeper pleasure, and all the possibilities that holds.
There’s something else about Conscious Sexuality that’s interesting.
It doesn’t happen in a vacuum.
It happens in the context of our lives.
And as our sexuality expands, our lives expand.
What happens when we experience more conscious pleasure is a lot.
I wrote a piece a while ago called As in Sex So in Life.
We become more creative.
We have more vitality and energy.
We enjoy the sensuality of life more. Both the sensuality connected to sex, and the sensuality of the world.
We communicate better.
We love more.
And a whole lot more.
Here’s the next thing.
This is a hard thing, one of the truths of Conscious Sexuality.
It takes more.
More effort, more time, more energy.
It takes learning, it takes a devotion.
It takes more than just the hop on, a squirt in the dark, hop off. Which on, average takes no more than 5-7 minutes.
Which makes us ask a question, a few questions.
If sex is so important to us, which from the amount of porn we watch, the amount of hook-up sex, the low-level of engagement, intimacy and relationship we experience, what are we doing?
What do we want?
Really want?
To a degree it’s about settling, it’s about mediocrity.
It’s about living in a world of sameness, of distraction and boredom.
It’s about living in a world where we feel more connected to a screen, anonymity, quick release and emptiness that requires more and more intensity than fulfillment.
It’s about a conscious choice.
For pleasure.
Not just pleasure for the sake of pleasure.
Pleasure that touches something inside of us.
Pleasure that opens us to life.
Life that can be deeper, more open.
Life wild and passionate.
Life beautiful.
Love.
