You Think You Have Time


Time has come up recently in my life in different ways, and the passing of a close friend made a ‘thunk’ in my chest.


Here are some thoughts, and I put these in the context of love, sensuality, sexuality, pleasure and intimacy.


We think we have time.

We don’t.

The people in our lives are there, and then they’re not. Some will be for a lifetime, some will be for a day. For so many reasons.

And we don’t know.

When the feeling is there, express it. Don’t get caught up in what it can mean, what it should mean, what it will become, what it will lead to. When it’s there, when it’s strong, when it’s in your heart, say it.

When you want to hold someone’s hand, say it.

Be present with yourself, feel what’s inside. And share it.



So many of us wait.

We wait to learn about love, about pleasure, about touch, about sensuality.


We don’t have time.

What we have is understanding that we make time for what’s important, for who is important. It takes us to a place of looking at life differently. It takes us to the place of thinking about this, at the end of this journey, whenever that may be, what is it that I want to look back on?

Do I want to have reached out to you today?

Did I kiss you with presence, tasting the subtle flavours of your mouth?

Did I hold you and breathe with you in a way that connected our hearts?

When I was inside you was I there, right there in sensation, in emotion?

When I looked in your eyes, did I look deep, did I open my eyes to you?

Did we make time to talk, to share?

I think of all the times I didn’t.

I realise that I know this, that we don’t have time, know it intellectually.

‘Thunk ’. You’re not going to know it until then.


It’s a challenging knowing.

It shifts your perception, sometimes a lot.


Nobody, at the end of this journey, wished they’d worked more.

But do we wish to love more?

Touch more, have more pleasure, connect more?

Do we choose to live more from our hearts?

And are we willing to do what that requires?

That’s the ‘thunk’.

It needs to be a choice, Conscious Choice, every day.

You take time back.

You reclaim yourself.


Conscious Pleasure becomes Conscious Life becomes Conscious Love.