Your sexual intimacy is about you, it begins with you and it’s within you.
We’ve been conditioned to the idea that it’s outside of ourselves, about someone else, that we’re sexual and sensual beings when we’re in a relationship, when we’re having sex. And we tend to think about ourselves sexually in the act of self-pleasuring.
You are a sensual and sexual being, and your intimacy and pleasure are not dependent on any other.
Look within.
Look at your body, your heart, your mind, your spirit.
Your sexual energy is yours.
You will be as intimate as you allow yourself to be. It doesn’t have as much to do with the person opposite you as you think. It’s your heart. It will be as open as you allow it. Everything that holds you back is yours. The fears are yours, the hurts are yours, the blockages, inhibitions, shames, guilt, judgments, embarrassments, withholds are yours. Living in the past is yours. Your lover, in whatever context that is, is simply a mirror for you to see yourself.
Your body will give and receive as much pleasure as you allow. Your skin, your pleasure centers, all the nerves in your body that are about pleasure will feel as much as you will.
The connection between your genitals and your heart, your sex and spirit, will be as open as you choose.
You will know your body as well as you will.
You will explore your fantasies, your sexual light and your sexual shadow, as much as you’re willing to.
You will communicate your wants and needs and desires as deeply as you will.
You will be as open, as exciting, as loving, as intimate, as daring and free as you will allow.
Yes, you’re not going to have a deep connection with every partner you have. Yes, the peak experiences are going to happen with very few people. Regardless, it’s about you.
Go within. Learn, explore yourself. Your lovers and partners are the space where your journey is reflected.
Healing journeys are the guides, the techniques and tools you learn help you go into yourself, help you understand, help you release, help you become the pleasure being you’d like to be.
Enter into experiences with purpose, with intention, with questions, what can you learn, what can you heal, what can this reveal, where can it take you? Consider what happens, what you feel, what you think, how you feel, what does it bring up within you? This alone can be a path that takes you beyond judgment into greater freedom.
Allow yourself to become your own lover, in every sense of the word. This is one of the greatest gifts you give to yourself. It requires awareness, consciousness, dedication. It’s a life-long relationship. It keeps changing, expanding, going deeper into possibility.
It takes you deeper into love, into your beauty.
I hope you’ll join us in Cae Town next week, Johannesburg after that, as we begin to explore, to heal, to grow, to open to deeper intimacy and pleasure, connection and possibility, as we awaken to life, to love.
