Love Waits
I am back in Johannesburg after an intense week of teaching in Cape Town.
The learning, the sharing, the intimacy, the healing, the connecting on all the workshops, all the sessions, all the conversations was deep. For me as well as everyone I shared with.
In a way I spent time with all of us.
I spent time with people going through difficulties with intimacy and sexuality in their relationships.
I spent time with people, men and women, who have been deeply hurt, emotionally, sexually, and are beginning to heal.
Lingam Coffee
Sunday morning at the Airport in Cape Town, going back to Jo’burg.
I’m carrying the container with my new Yoni and Lingam, get to the security check. It goes through the scanner and they stop the conveyor belt.
It is so clear, the Lingam, unmistakable in its glory. It’s not a small piece either.
Sexual Energy
‘Was walking around in a bit of a daze afterwards.
It was amazing! I just relaxed and breathed gently through a kaleidoscope of colour. These beautiful sensations like tiny pulses moved up my body. Followed by one big intense orgasm that went right up to my heart down my arms and kept going! The contractions up my body really intense felt amazing! Never experienced one like that before! Definitely would like more of that! It felt really good and soo welcome.’
Coffee and Duct Tape
What in the world have coffee and duct tape got to do with each other?
My daughter asked me a question last night.
She phrased it more or less like this, ‘I don’t know if I want to know the answer to this but I’m asking anyway, why is there a roll of duct tape on the counter in the kitchen?’
I laughed.
This was not an uncommon question in my home.
I Found Something
I found something recently, and there might be something for you in what I’ve found.
I have always loved what I do.
When people talk about having a job I’ve never really thought of this as a job in the traditional sense.
I don’t think you can do this kind of work when you see it as a job.
I’ve always loved it.
It hasn’t always been easy, in fact there have been times of great hardship, in every way. Financially, emotionally, romantically, sexually, spiritually.
But I’ve always loved it, and can’t see myself doing much else.
Maybe a pancake bar on a beach, that’s always been a fantasy.
This Divine Body
From the ends of your toes to the tips of your fingers to the top of your head.
Your Divine Body.
There is a lifetime in your body, a lifetime of sensation, a lifetime of feelings, a lifetime of emotions.
Two, an egg, a sperm, came together to make one, you.
In this, your divine body.
There is no other like you, unique beauty in this skin.
Your skin holds you perfectly, surrounds you, gives you a home.
To make love with you, to make love to you, is to make love to all of you.
All of you, all of your divine body.
Yoni Massage and the Practice of Time
I was recently asked to teach a course on Yoni Massage for a group of practitioners.
This filled me with excitement for a few reasons.
The first is I love to teach, and I love to inspire others, and the more I’m able to inspire you, the more inspired I get, we all expand.
In this expansion, and in the teaching, in the creating of the course, in putting any workshop or retreat together, I learn. And when I learn I get more inspired to share. As I put a course together, even if it’s something I’ve been teaching for years, there are always new insights and understandings. Many of these come from the questions you ask, the discussions we have, and the practices, the practices, the practices. So much understanding emerges from the practices. This understanding allows the practice to expand.
One Manly Tear
I was watching an episode of Masterchef last week, the UK series. There was a man who had come pretty far in the competition and at one point, having got through to the next round, said that he had ‘Shed one manly tear at the emotion.’
One manly tear!
Fuck One Manly Tear!
Where are our hearts, where are our feelings, where are our voices, where are our tears?
Where are our sobs, gut wrenching, releasing all the pain we need to?
Mouth Massage
Our mouths are incredibly intimate, and they hold a key to some deep releasing, healing, intimacy, expansion and pleasure.
Over the past months I’ve been doing some work with the mouth and throat that has had a big impact on the journeys I share with you.
A while ago on a growth group I was facilitating I taught a practice of connecting with the mouth, creating an Intimacy with the mouth.
Deepening Into Love
For the past, it’s nearly two years now, I haven’t had a sexual partner, I haven’t had a lover, I haven’t had a relationship.
Not in the traditional sense.
This has been a time of going into myself, into my body, into my sensuality and sexuality.
It’s affirmed something I’ve known and taught for a long time.
Our love, our sexuality, our sensuality, our pleasure, is about us.
This Conscious Kiss
Kissing is one of the most intimate acts we can share with a partner, in fact there are times when kissing is more intimate than sex. Kissing brings us closer together than anything. Because kissing is so intimate, it also expresses our emotional state.
Kissing is the sharing of our essence. In the exchange of fluids and breath we mix ourselves with our lovers.
Sacred Yoni Massage
The sacred in me arises when I sit before you, when I look into your eyes.
The sacred in me arises when I kneel before you.
The sacred in me arises when I sit between your legs.
The sacred in me arises when I rest my hand on your heart.
The sacred in me arises when I rest my hand on your Yoni.
The sacred in me arises when I worship you.
My Orgasmic Gratitude
The energy of gratitude has such power.
It brings us into awareness, into presence.
It’s an element of intimacy.
It connects us to ourselves, to another, to life, to the world.
Gratitude heals.
There is a sense of wonder in gratitude, wonder for this life we live, for this breath we breathe, for what we feel, what we hear, what we see, what we smell, what we taste, what we feel, what we sense.
There is a wonder for this body, this heart.
There is a joy in gratitude, a joy being alive, vital, pulsating.
There’s a beautiful concept, and practice that I teach called Orgasmic Gratitude.
Coffee and a Kiss
It’s been a while since I’ve written a Coffee piece, it’s also been a while, a long while since I’ve written an erotic piece.
I remember, she said, I asked you this long ago, a little while after we’d met.
I asked you how you were going to kiss me the first time we kissed.
Our Sexual Connection
Most people who come and see me, looking for healing, as that’s where so many journeys into sensuality, into Conscious Sexuality, into Tantra begin, are looking for something.
They’re looking to connect with their sexuality.
Some of us have never had that connection, have never owned our sexuality, never been comfortable, deeply comfortable, in our sexuality.
Some of us have disconnected from it over time, through stress, through trauma, through unfulfilled experiences, unmet expectations, disappointment and so many other issues.
My Love is My Arousal
Conscious Pleasure Experiences have the amazing quality of being portals of learning, healing and growth. This is where we shift from having sex to making love. We shift from a goal-oriented experience, orgasm, to a heart-centered experience.
It’s driven by a model that has trapped men in a very narrow experience of sexuality.
It’s silent.
And it’s silence it’s become repressed, suppressed, disconnected.
It’s become angry and emotionless.
It’s a pattern of limitation, of contraction.
Changing the Lingam Pattern
For so many men the masculine expression of sexuality is hard.
It’s driving, it’s taking.
Its need based, released based.
It’s about size, performance.
It’s driven by a model that has trapped men in a very narrow experience of sexuality.
It’s silent.
And it’s silence it’s become repressed, suppressed, disconnected.
It’s become angry and emotionless.
It’s a pattern of limitation, of contraction.
The Massage High
A while ago after a deep massage exchange someone said that she feels high, trippy, spacey.
Just looking at her I could see that she was in an expanded state of consciousness. There was a glow of joy, of peace, a radiance that was palpable.
Over the years of doing and teaching massage, something has emerged that’s given me a different perspective on massage and touch.
Hello
It’s the beginning of the year so it’s a great time to introduce, and re-introduce myself to you.
There’s also a lot that’s new in my work which is another good reason.
But first, a digression, I love digressions.
The only thing that’s going to make this year different, regardless of what’s happening externally, is our own inner journeys of healing, growth, learning and experience. That’s it. There is so much more to be said about this, books have been written about, there are so many talks and videos, about it.
The simplicity of it is just that, it’s about our inner journey.
I’m For The Slow
I’m for the slow….
For in the slow we feel.
In the slow we savour.
In the slow is the subtle.
In the slow is presence.
In the slow is appreciation.
In the slow is awareness.
In the slow our hearts open.
In the slow our bodies open.
In the slow we come into awareness.
I’m for the slow…
Lessons in Sacred Sex 3
Slowly, she said to me, slowly.
Rest the head of your Lingam at the opening of my Yoni.
Be still, breathe.
Feel her open, feel her begin to invite you in, to welcome you.
This is the honoring of the temple.
Make Love with Your Hands, Make Love with Life
I talk about making love with life.
I talk about how when we hear the term ‘making love’ our thoughts go to our genitals, to sex.
I talk about how making love happens in so many ways, and our genitals and sex are just one aspect of that.
I talk about how when we live more from our Hearts, life becomes an expression of making love.
I also talk about Heart-Centered Sexuality, as being more of an expression of love, of making love, than sex.
G-Spot Holding
G-Spot Holding is a deep practice of healing and release.
It’s a practice of pleasure.
It’s a practice of feeling and sensation.
It’s a practice of intimacy and connection.
It’s a practice of energy.
It’s a practice of allowing.
Allowing in healing, as that’s where so many of our journeys begin, is important.
In allowing, the body, the wisdom within us, becomes the guide.
Coffee, Panettone and Expanded Orgasm
Coffee this afternoon is special, with one of my favorite things, Panettone, so deliciously sensual.
I am so glad we only get them for a short time in South Africa, at this time of the year.
Tonight’s workshop is also special, one of my favorites to teach. I enjoy everything I teach, Expanded Orgasm is always special as it was one of the first workshops I taught
Coffee of Loving and Longing
Coffee this afternoon is fascinating.
I’m sipping it slowly, savoring the taste, the aroma. I’m looking at the sky, the garden, the clouds. I love watching clouds. I’m listening to the birds, distant traffic.
I’ve written and deleted a few lines so many times.
It’s a delicate coffee, delicate of body, delicate of mind.
A Conscious Pleasure Experience
Coffee this afternoon is back home in Johannesburg.
There’s a rain shower, gentle rain, and I can see the sun shining in some parts of the sky, in the distance.
The sound of the raindrops falling on the different surfaces, the grass, the trees, the roof, the railings of the balcony, come together, separate.
My cup is nearly empty as I write this, something that’s been inside for a long time.
